Thursday, 27 December 2012

paedarchy: The rule or government by a child or children

I realize that for the most part paedarchies refer to groupings in school settings or playdates, or even the occasional foreign circumstance, however, a good majority of the time I feel like my household is ruled by a paedocracy.

In this day and age, disciplining a child is a difficult task.  Spanking is frowned upon and for good reason.  I don't want to teach my children that hitting is okay when you're angry.  I don't want them to start smacking each other, they already throw in the occasional low-blow when I'm not looking.  Yelling is frowned upon and although it's understandable why, attempting to keep a handle on your temper in the heat of the moment can most certainly feel like an insurmountable task at the best of times.  Granted I don't want my girls yelling at me when they're upset but I can understand through experience that sometimes your anger or overwhelming emotions need an outlet.

What does that leave us?  Threats.  Well for those parents who are pushovers, (my girls' father being one of them, all they have to do is look up at him with those big beautiful eyes, smile and say 'I Love You Daddy' and whatever they want is theirs), the threats he/she/they give might as well be as ridiculous as sending them to the moon if they don't eat their dinner.  Time outs.  Alright, so they get sent to the corner but are they really upset?  My daughter just stands there fidgeting with the hinges on the door or mumbling to keep herself entertained.

No wonder kids rule their parents nowadays.  I realize respect needs to be taught and for the most part we teach by our own actions, but at this point no matter how hard I try to display proper behaviour I can't help but wonder if my kids are picking it up.  And what about children without role models?  What happens to them?

My whole day revolves around my kids, my whole life at this point does.  While I enjoy my children immensely, every moment I spend with them is one of the purest forms of joy a person could find, well almost every moment.  But when I find myself constantly reasoning, debating, threatening, compromising, I can't help but feel that I am the one being controlled, and my children are my rulers.

Wednesday, 12 December 2012

Inspiration:1. stimulation or arousal of the mind, feelings, etc, to special or unusual activity or creativity 2. the state or quality of being so stimulated or aroused 3. someone or something that causes this state

All beautiful things come from inspiration.  And yet all things have beauty within them.  Does this mean that every thing of being is born from the bosom of inspiration?

The fact that each human being holds within them their own unique desires and aspirations allows us to live in an exciting world full of the treasures of diversity.  We have all this ipseity to thank for birthing the creation of each and every inspired idea.

But it is not simply the end result of inspiration that is encompassed in beauty.  It is the first spark of an idea that ignites in our brains and fills us with excitement.  It is the narrow path, the winding path, the path full of zigzags, that leads us to the fulfillment of our desires.  And most of all it is the pure exhilarating, invigorating, magnetic feeling, the genuine heart of being inspired.

Wednesday, 5 December 2012

Gratitude: a feeling of thankfulness or appreciation, as for gifts or favours

Perhaps the most beautiful thing in this world that we can share with others and still have for ourselves is gratitude.  Taking a moment to step back and look at our lives, there are so many little moments we can give thanks to.  For starters, I'm grateful that I woke up this morning.  How many people have lost the ability to say that?  On top of that, I'm grateful that I woke up in my cozy warm apartment.  It might not be the most beautiful luxurious house, but it is comfy and it is home and I am so grateful that I even have a place to live.  How many people don't have that luxury?

Despite the fact that all I want to do is keep my eyes closed and continue to chase the dream that is sleep, I am grateful that my two little girls have woken up today also.  Although many moments of the day might turn out to be difficult, a battle over using the potty, a compromise at mealtime, a game of patience at nap time, I am grateful for absolutely every moment I have in this lifetime that I can spend with the two people I consider more precious than anyone I've ever met.

Even though my father is resting in a hospital bed, too stubborn to accept my offer and come live with me, even though cancer is slowly taking over more of his body causing him pain and turning him into somewhat of a stranger, I am eternally grateful for the time I've already had with him.  Thinking back to each and every lecture on what I should be doing with my life, I am now capable of giving thanks for his concern over my well-being.  Remembering all the ridiculously foolish fights over nothing, I can even be grateful for those because in the end they have brought me into the light of understanding and we have drawn closer because of it.  The ability to be grateful for all the moments I have had, all the conversations, all the hugs, even all the tears, allows me to draw a little closer to acceptance over the inevitable.

Gratitude can be found for everything and everyone and once we learn to recognize even the most trying moments in life as a gift, an opportunity to grow and learn, life becomes a much happier place to be.