Thursday, 27 December 2012

paedarchy: The rule or government by a child or children

I realize that for the most part paedarchies refer to groupings in school settings or playdates, or even the occasional foreign circumstance, however, a good majority of the time I feel like my household is ruled by a paedocracy.

In this day and age, disciplining a child is a difficult task.  Spanking is frowned upon and for good reason.  I don't want to teach my children that hitting is okay when you're angry.  I don't want them to start smacking each other, they already throw in the occasional low-blow when I'm not looking.  Yelling is frowned upon and although it's understandable why, attempting to keep a handle on your temper in the heat of the moment can most certainly feel like an insurmountable task at the best of times.  Granted I don't want my girls yelling at me when they're upset but I can understand through experience that sometimes your anger or overwhelming emotions need an outlet.

What does that leave us?  Threats.  Well for those parents who are pushovers, (my girls' father being one of them, all they have to do is look up at him with those big beautiful eyes, smile and say 'I Love You Daddy' and whatever they want is theirs), the threats he/she/they give might as well be as ridiculous as sending them to the moon if they don't eat their dinner.  Time outs.  Alright, so they get sent to the corner but are they really upset?  My daughter just stands there fidgeting with the hinges on the door or mumbling to keep herself entertained.

No wonder kids rule their parents nowadays.  I realize respect needs to be taught and for the most part we teach by our own actions, but at this point no matter how hard I try to display proper behaviour I can't help but wonder if my kids are picking it up.  And what about children without role models?  What happens to them?

My whole day revolves around my kids, my whole life at this point does.  While I enjoy my children immensely, every moment I spend with them is one of the purest forms of joy a person could find, well almost every moment.  But when I find myself constantly reasoning, debating, threatening, compromising, I can't help but feel that I am the one being controlled, and my children are my rulers.

No comments:

Post a Comment