Tuesday, 9 April 2013

H: Happy Home

What does it really take to create a happy home for your kids?  A loving relationship?  Lots of money?  A happy mama?  Well of course all of these things certainly help but they're not requirements (except maybe a happy mama).  What it all boils down to is patience, tactics for dealing with stress, and belief.

It doesn't matter how wonderful your kids are, how helpful your partner is, or how much free time you manage to finagle out of the day, there are going to be moments of broken sanity.  What you do in those moments will be what dictates the mood for the rest of the day, perhaps even longer.

One of the greatest tips I can give (although I find it hard to follow myself at times) is... forgive yourself.  Forgive yourself when you lose your cool.  Forgive yourself when you forget something.  Forgive yourself when you do something wrong.  You're not that hard on your kids, why should you be so hard on yourself?

I know it's difficult, especially when you are unable to contain the frustration bubbling inside, but one of the most beautiful things about children is that they don't hold onto things.  You might yell, you might get angry, but afterwards you apologize, it's forgotten, and your little darlings are back to being happy, so now it's your turn.

Smile even when you're angry.  I know it makes me sound like I should be put in an institute, you know the ones with the straight jackets and padded rooms, but... even if it's fake, it will help you pick up your mood, or at least help you stop yourself in your tracks and prevent the escalation of anger or the downward spiral of a broken-hearted funk.

So... Just keep smiling, Just keep smiling, Just keep smiling, smiling, smiling (and if you're feeling really rebellious, let out a little giggle even!)

14 comments:

  1. Oh to forgive ... it is the hardest of all activities, isn't it?

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  2. Forgiving is definitely the hardest, but it's the one we need the most. And we should definitely keep smiling! :)

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    1. I agree, forgiveness is one of the most important lessons in life.

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  3. For me, a happy home is about cooking at home more, going for nature hikes, and not making life about things that cost money. I think if we spend time doing nice stuff in our home, we will value that over time.

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    1. Well said! I definitely agree that we need to focus on the importance of being with our family and 'not make life about things that cost money'.

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  4. This is Julia from sweetbeariesart.com, by the way.

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  5. Great advice, though hard to put into practice :)

    Left and Write

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    1. It's definitely a difficult thing to do, but I'd like to believe the more you try, the easier it becomes. One can hope at least. :)

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  6. I can't smile when I'm angry. It reminds me too much of my old passive/aggressive behavior. But I can see what you mean. :) Great post!

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    1. I see where you're coming from. I used to be the type of person who would just smile and accept, learning to stand up and overcome this was big for me.

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  7. This is Chris from hookerwithyarnstringsattached, btw. Darn, I hated having to do that to you!

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  8. Forgiveness for yourself is crucial. Especially after they leave home. I find the Buddhist Prayer Of Forgiveness so helpful!
    If I have harmed any one in any way,
    either knowingly or unknowingly
    through my own confusions,
    I ask their forgiveness.
    If any one has harmed me in any way,
    either knowingly or unknowingly
    through their own confusions,
    I forgive them.
    And if there is a situation
    I am not yet ready to forgive,
    I forgive myself for that.
    For all the ways that I harm myself,
    negate, doubt, belittle myself,
    judge or be unkind to myself,
    through my own confusions,
    I forgive myself.

    Isn't that lovely? That's what helps me!

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