Thursday 4 April 2013

D: Disastrous Diapers

It's funny how grossed out we are by baby poop, at least in the very beginning.  But eventually we become diaper changing experts and become almost obsessed with our baby's bowel movements.  What colour is it?  Why is it that colour?  What does that mean?  Is it hard or soft?  How many times did he/she poop today?  Oh no!  My baby hasn't pooped!

The more accustomed we become to the little presents awaiting us in our little sweeties' diapers, the more able we become to find the humour in it all.  I'm sure every parent out there has their fair share of poopy stories.  If not yet, don't worry, your time will come.

I can still remember my poopy days...

I had just finished getting everything set up and ready for my daughter's bath.  The towel was resting dutifully on the towel rack.  The soap and shampoo were in position.  The water was waiting to snuggle her little body.  The only thing left to do was take off that dreaded diaper.  Big mistake.

The pooping started, without any sounding fart warnings even.

Now most parents are familiar with the stages of baby poop: black sticky tar, mustardy seedy yellow, greens, oranges, browns, and sometimes even rainbow coloured and lumpy.  Well this one was green and slimy.  When it started, my boyfriend caught some of it in his hand.  With these pre-warning rumblings, he tried holding her over the bathroom sink for the rest of it.  But this poop had a mind of its own.  It was an explosion.  It went all over the bathroom wall behind the sink.  Was it gross?  Yes.  Was it easy to clean up?  Fairly.  Will it ever be forgotten?  Nope.

Then there were the days when my darling baby girl would be playing in her exersaucer, bouncing and giggling with joy, only stopping to do her business.  When I would check her.  Somehow.  Every.  Single.  Time.  The poop had crawled out of her diaper, all the way up her back and sometimes even onto her shirt.  There were more than plenty of these incidents.

And now I may not have had boys, but between leaky diapers and my youngest daughter who peed nearly every time I took her diaper off, I've had my fair share of being peed on too.

We've all got 'em, and I'd love to hear your disastrous diaper stories.

15 comments:

  1. even i don't have children on my own, i have had some poop moments to remember. I was in a short holidays with a couple and a 3month old baby. In two days there was no poo and on the third day while we were having breakfast he decided it was time... it was so much that even some ended up on the floor :)

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    1. oh my goodness, what a mess! It must have been even more gross for you since it wasn't your baby.

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    2. well, it's a very very good friend, so it feels like I'm the aunty ;) I was happy I didn't have to clean it, he,he,he

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  2. I've never changed a diaper in my life and I aim to keep it that way. I'm 48. I refused to babysit for children who weren't potty trained, and the one time I did have an infant, my mom came to the house to change the diaper b/c she knew I wouldn't. I was 13 or 14. My fiance' has 3 kids in their early 20s and he looks forward to grandkids. Me....I'm more than a little freaked out by it. I told him he will have to deal w/ all diaper issues. I don't even wanna be holding a kid and have the diaper need to be changed. I get the dry heaves when my dogs poop in the yard! lol

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    1. lol, I guess poop is just not your thing. :) My Dad never changed a diaper in his life either. I wish I could say such a thing but I'm sure I've changed thousands, maybe even hundreds of thousands. :)

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  3. Your post brought me back about 12 years. Before I had children, I had about zero experience with babies. However, I adapted very fast. With the diapers they have today, it's not that bad..unless there's an accident of the kind you have described. I think a mature adult can handle it. ahhhem...

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    1. Babies can certainly be messy! :) Oh well, it makes it all that much more fun when it comes to storytelling :)

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  4. I don't have kids of my own, but I babysit for a friend. Her oldest at the time of this story was around age 2 or so:

    They'd purchased this great new juice. New junk it, tastes great, good for the kid. My niece asked for a cup of juice. I gave her a sippy cup (one of the taller ones) full and she happily drank her juice. She even asked for more. I filled it back up. Her mom came home for her lunch break and my niece seemed a bit crabby. Oh well, it was nearly nap time, she's probably tired.

    After lunch, we were sitting around when my niece bolted from the table and 'had to go potty!' my friend followed to make sure she did everything okay...but there was a surprise waiting. Suddenly from the back I hear "Can you get me a bath towel?" Confused, I did as my friend asked...and saw my niece lying on her bedroom floor COVERED IN POO...and it smelled just like the juice. It took us close to 15 minutes to get everything cleaned up. Upon discussion, I told my friend about the juice.

    That juice is now rarely purchased. It is also rationed. And we call it the "poop juice"...great for a constipated child. Just keep 'em by the potty for a while. *laughs* And keep the bathtub handy.

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    1. hahaha, your story was great! Poop juice. This is actually a great tool for sure, when you need it. I'm sure it beats the taste of prune juice. Thanks for sharing your story. :)

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  5. This was too funny, I am so glad my kids are way past the diaper stage! Thank for stopping by my blog, I have followed you so I can keep with your A to Z blogs also.

    A MOM'S POINT OF VIEW
    http://www.AMomsPointOfView.com

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    1. I can't wait to be past the diaper stage. Mind you potty training can be a bit messy too. It will be nice when this part of parenting is gone but I'm in no hurry for my kids to grow up, it feels like they grow so fast already!

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  6. My first child liked to 'paint'. Poop everywhere when I got him up from his nap. Fortunately for me he was the only one with that passion. I formed my own diaper philosophy of life. If you like children, you ipso facto like diapers. At least it makes life less of a hassle if lyou come to that point.

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    1. I've heard of kids doing this, luckily mine never took up this form of art. :)

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  7. It's funny how fascinating poop can be. My daughter is two and if she doesn't get to flush her stinkies then she cries because they were her stinkies and she wanted to send them away.

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    1. That's so cute that your daughter wants to send away her stinkies. My oldest daughter is the same way in that she always wants to see it. For the longest time she used to say 'bye-bye' to it, I'm glad we've moved past that phase. :)

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